Bonding Over Your Bush: Lets Talk Lady-Scaping While Pregnant

Your chatch hasn’t seen the light of day since your belly cast a big ‘ol shadow over it.  Your bush is growing into a national forest.  Women on death row are probably better groomed than you. 
Pregnancy makes your hair (including pubic hair) grow a zillion times faster and thicker. 
While having the Mariah Carey look on your head is glam, having it frizz out all over your lady parts – is a messy situation.

I’m not saying you gotta be bare down there to be sexy or attractive. Pah-lease.  We women got enough beauty pressures.

But I draw the line at braids of bush poking out around the bikini line.  Especially in the summertime. 

Pregnant or not.

Do you really want the medical staff at the hospital to activate a search party for your baby when you pop it out – because it’s buried in 2 feet of woo-hoo wool?

Lady-scaping before labor is not a luxury, it's essential.

Before you rush off to the salon for a wax – let me tell you why your partner is the perfect person for the job.  You two are bonding over a baby, why not bond over your bush?

Five reasons you should let your partner groom your vag while pregnant.

1.  Save yourself the embarrassment at the salon.  Your esthetician hasn’t seen you in months.  She’s probably already moved on to another salon.  You’ll have to show that “situation” to a new girl.  Are you prepared to put your pubed out, poo-nanny on display for the new, young, hot, perfectly perky twenty-something year old esthetician at your salon?  Don’t even think about a Brazilian if you have hemorrhoids – you’ll scare the shit out of the salon staff.

2. Professional grooming is really expensive.  At a salon - a bikini wax is like $40.  A Brazilian wax can run you about $80.  Don’t even get me started on the Sphynx wax.  An at-home wax kit is like $10-$20 and you can use it more than once.  

3.  It can be done in the comfort of your own home.  On your own bed.  With someone who you are (hopefully by now), totally comfortable with.

4. You can lay back, hold your leg up, watch Netflix and have a bowl of popcorn propped up on your pregnant belly during the wax sesh.  Perfection.

5. Your partner might get turned on.  And you might too.  I don’t know what it is about grooming that makes people want to get their groove on.  Just go with it.  But promise me you’ll wash and lubricate the newly-waxed area really well before all that friction.

I’m not saying it’s going to be salon quality.  But, your lady parts will go from over-grown chia-pet, to child birth ready chic.  A partner wax sesh while you’re pregnant will help you knock out the three B's - bond over baby, belly and bush.

How did you stay groomed while pregnant?

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